Posted by: Helena Smalman-Smith | December 22, 2011

Day 18: Outbreak of OARS in SW London

The under-secretary for Dot Watchers in the Ministry of Ocean Rowing confirmed today that an epidemic of OARS (Obsessive Atlantic Rowing Supporting) has broken out in the SW London area, around Kingston on Thames. After the Cook family was officially diagnosed, it has also emerged that several other classes of school children may have been infected by adults incubating the condition before the holidays. The behaviour of such children, particularly students of mathematics, will be closely monitored from the start of next term.

Symptoms are mainly an incessant desire to check how far a small orange dot has progressed across a screen. The condition is chronic and incurable, but bouts generally last only 60-90 days, though invariably return every two years or so. There is no known treatment, although sufferers may find some relief by dressing as a tiger.

Other, more isolated, cases have been reported further afield, in Wales, Sheffield, Edinburgh and Norfolk. A 3 year old girl in Sydney, Australia is showing some symptoms, as are 3 girls in Bucharest, and a couple currently in Thailand. Other sufferers are in their 70’s.

Conditions have been rubbish again today with high seas, stuffish winds, and major wave patterns coming from 2 perpendicular directions. Thank goodness, once again, for Angus. There will be drogue action again tonight, and if the forecasted mess of waves against wind tomorrow materialises, it could be a day on sea anchor (thanks, as ever, for that tip, Chris). Do let us know what other crews are doing if they’re talking about it!

Congrats to Baz’s daughter Bethan on her engagement – bet these are the only such wishes she’s getting from mid-ocean!

Rog – still struggling with that anagram. Is “charity” a word in it? Also, sorry to hear someone has nicked your outboard engine. The funny thing is that I can’t find ours either – it would be ever so useful out here…

Helen Green – great to hear from you and hope the baby is doing well.

Lisa, those years were tough, but how about:
2006 – launched its member only section, the Mind Tools Club
1999 – Millennium dome finished (just)
1992 – Barcelona Olympics
1982 – Falklands War?
1974 – there was a referendum on something like Britain joining the Common Market, wasn’t there?

What did you think of?

We gather that people are enjoying the KGS carols on the website (thanks E&L) – we’ve been enjoying them here too – it really is a privilege to have our own personal concert! And to hear Go, Go Didi again!

Glad to hear that our cat (tiny scrap of senile fur) has persuaded our house sitter Jack (grown man and lifelong dog-lover) to let her sleep on his bed. Atta girl Tanni.

Wildlife bit: saw another of the sailfish things I mentioned yesterday. MDH – could you poss research if this is indeed a sailfish and is it plausible in this part of the pond?

Coming soon – beard report!

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